● giftofgab415 :
hello world! lets start chating,whats on your mind?
● Coffeyr :
There is someone I am thinking to dedicate my life to. He is a wonderful father and a supportive partner. The concern I have is his work ethic... I am not sure that this is a strong trait. I am a highly motivated and experienced person, almost to what som
● Coffeyr :
So... these two things are lacking in this person unfortunately. The thing that is frustrating is that he is the most amazing person an you will never find anyone else who is so wonderful. It is like two polar opposites in qualities.
● Coffeyr :
I am not sure how to handle this because I love him. I am afraid.
● Coffeyr :
I am not looking for him to be perfect, I love him for who he is. I just wish that he could have spent some of the last 10 years working as hard as I have worked to get where I am now, or to at least have the desire and will to push forward and grow.
● Coffeyr :
I am still trying to see if he is motivated to grow and learn the way I am, or if he is just wanting to stay where he is at. To me, this would be stagnating. Can two people have a successful happy life together if one person is potentially stagnating- at
● Coffeyr :
I sometimes wonder if it is just my being motivated and driven to a degree that is perhaps too extreme. I have really achieved a lot, however I am only now since I met him for the first time feeling finished all the extremes and happy to just live life. s
● Coffeyr :
Perhaps he is simply in a current "tail spin" period of life. We have them sometimes due to series of events that life sometiimes throws at us.
● Coffeyr :
I believe it is the definition of the character of a person in how they deal with and recover from these periods in life.
● Coffeyr :
So... I suppose I must wait, be supportive, and see how he handles this.
● Coffeyr :
The only reason I have had this difficulty is in finding his employment history is quite spotty, at least in the last 5 years. Granted he is a single father of a 4 year old boy, this is an imhumaly challenging porition to be in
● Coffeyr :
I am not a parent and so this is not somemthing I can appreciate for what it really is
● Coffeyr :
I realize now that I sound to be very unfair and judgemental of someone I love
● Coffeyr :
He has "not shown up" for a few jobs he has picked up last while. I cant help but wonder if he has been the type who can hold down job? I say this anonymous in some chat room I would never sign up for and have not ever been part of any chat room before i
● Coffeyr :
I am just exasperated and I cant possible say these things to anyone.
● Coffeyr :
Is he unmotivated? He did not show up for hi job the other day, he said he slept in... ok we all do something stupid once in a while and I would not look twice of it were not for the employment history and history of not completing what he starts
● Coffeyr :
I asked what he thought would happen if he did not have a good reference from this employer for his next job. He said he just would not put it on his resume
● Coffeyr :
I explained that any gaps in the history of employment bring up questions, he said he would just claim to have been unemployed. This did not sit well with me
● Coffeyr :
again, because of all the pieces I am picking up about his motivation to succeed and excel. This sounds awful to me as I read it.
● Coffeyr :
Sure, I can have a good job once I am finished school. I just cant help that feeling of the man being the foundation reliable, breadwinner. I mean at least in theory. I know he feels this on some level as well
● Coffeyr :
Anyway thats my story, Now I must sleep, I have a presentation tomorrow. Thanks for tuning in.
● Coffeyr :
So here I am day 2 of being in a chat room.
● Coffeyr :
I still have no idea how this chat thing works. For all I know this is a soundboard and I'm just anonymously writing on some wall.
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